Dealing With Imposter Syndrome

“One day, I’m going to get a project I don’t know how to tackle, and everyone’s going to know I’m a total imposter.” Many people think like this—and it doesn’t just apply to new hires or people switching careers. From middle managers to CEOs to high-ranking politicians, somewhere around 70 percent of people experience what’s known as imposter syndrome during their lifetimes, including a third of all millennials. 

Where does imposter syndrome come from? Theories suggest a lot of it has to do with our youth, our upbringing and our sense of self-worth. Let’s look at the criteria for imposter syndrome—and why you’re probably a lot better at your career, hobbies and passions than your brain thinks you are. 

What is imposter syndrome?

A relatively new concept in psychological terms, imposter syndrome was studied during the late 

‘70s by psychologists Suzanne Imes and Pauline Rose Clance. During their research, Imes and Clance discovered three core qualities among people who suffer from imposter syndrome:

• People suffering from imposter syndrome think others have an oversized belief in their skills
• People suffering from imposter syndrome are worried about being exposed as “fake” or “fraudulent”
• People suffering from imposter syndrome consistently diminish their achievements and abilities through self-deprecation

Imposter syndrome is likely to show up when you’re first taking on a new task. This could be a new job, a new course at a university, a new relationship or a new creative pursuit. The effects are immediate and can consume the lives of even the most accomplished people: crippling fear, anxiety, guilt and depression are known to follow.

In the end, people with imposter syndrome often do fail, but not because they’re untalented. Ironically, the syndrome itself makes them sabotage their own success before they’ve achieved what they’ve set out to do. 

If you value your job, your relationships and your goals, here’s how to combat imposter syndrome before it interferes with your bigger plans.

Start with mindfulness and brain training

No matter what “problem” we think we’re dealing with, the source is usually the same: our beliefs about ourselves and the world around us. Imposter syndrome falls neatly into this category—it’s a problem constructed entirely by our brains that creates real-world issues where they actually don’t exist.

It follows, then, that the best way to challenge imposter syndrome is to challenge your beliefs. Some people call this mindfulness. Others call it brain training. Whatever term you prefer to use, the core principles are the same: any time you’re up against something that makes you feel like an imposter, your goal is to challenge your thoughts and consider your strengths instead of focusing on potential shortcomings. 

Here’s an example. Let’s say you’ve been given a task at work that you don’t think you can effectively handle. If you have imposter syndrome, your thoughts may sound something like this:

• Why would my boss ever pick me to do this?
• They’re all going to find out I’m a fake when this fails.
• I should quit now before people see me as a fraud.
• Maybe there’s some way I can get out of doing this.

These thoughts come naturally to people with imposter syndrome, but they’re only natural because they’ve been hard-wired into your psyche. Years of this kind of thinking can make it an automatic response to challenges. It’s not unlike a stress response, or a fight-or-flight reaction.

So, the next time you’re grappling with thoughts like these, start challenging them and looking for alternatives. When you’re given a hard task, tell yourself: 

• If my boss picked me to do this, then clearly they believe in my ability to get the job done.

• I can’t be a “fake” if the project hasn’t failed yet. And even if it does fail, that doesn’t make me “fake”—lots of people have failures along the way to greater success.

• If I quit now, that’s my imposter syndrome self-sabotaging me before I can truly thrive in this position.

• Instead of trying to get out of this, I’m going to believe in my ability to use my smarts, my resources and my network of people to get this job done.

Look for positive reinforcement

We are the story we tell ourselves about ourselves. Everything we’ve ever done, achieved or screwed up has become ingrained within us, leading us to believe we “are” one way or “are” another way. 

If you stopped trying to learn guitar as a teenager because it was hard, you’ve probably told others that you “have no musical talent.” If you were fired once from a job, you’ve probably believed at some point that you’re not qualified enough to work in that field. And if you’ve been in a failed relationship, you’ve probably wondered if you’re really cut out for love.

What happens when we internalize these stories? We believe in them so strongly that they impact our future decisions. If we think we’re not qualified for our jobs, then we’re not going to seek out more responsibilities at work. If we think we can’t learn a musical instrument because it was hard, then we’re never going to pick up a guitar again.

See how it works?

Don’t worry, though. Challenging these beliefs about ourselves is simple. All it takes is thinking about the moments in life we DID succeed, DID achieve something, to put us back on the right path. Instead of giving in to your brain’s natural predisposition to emphasize the most catastrophic moments of your career, relationship, or life, it helps to give your brain NEW data. 

In layman’s terms, new data means telling yourself new stories about yourself. When have you succeeded? What are you most proud of? What have you achieved so far? Here are some examples:

• I was promoted all the way from a small-time position to the executive role I now have.
• I raised amazing kids despite how hard parenting can be.
• I lost weight last year after years of not prioritizing my health.
• I got a tough job done on deadline and under budget last week. 
• Despite several painful relationships, my heart is still open to love, and that takes a lot of courage.
• I graduated from college even though it was difficult to do. 
• I may not be published, but I’ve written several books, which is more than most people can say. 
• I’ve combated my mental illness and have learned how to live with it. 

These are specific examples that may not apply to you, but they help illustrate a larger point: looking to your past achievements will help you remember that, for the most part, you’ve made it through every single challenge you’ve ever faced. You stand here today in one piece—and that’s definitely not the sign of an imposter.

Try journaling with these prompts

The two pieces of advice above—challenging your beliefs and looking for past successes—make for great writing prompts. Writing about these things can help them feel more “real” than if you simply keep them in your head. So, the next time you’re feeling plagued by imposter syndrome, try the following two journaling prompts and see where they take you:

• Prompt 1: In one column, write down as many “imposter syndrome”-related thoughts as you can think of. In the next, trade those thoughts up into better and believable beliefs about yourself.
  
  
• Prompt 2: Collect evidence of as many “wins” as you can think of. Write down every single achievement you’ve ever made—from collecting blue ribbons at high school sports competitions to getting out of bed on days where you’re feeling burnt out—and then read them back to yourself. 

These two prompts are just starters, of course. You can get as creative as you’d like with the prompts you create. 

Try coaching

Therapy has its place when considering feelings of self-doubt, but imposter syndrome is uniquely suited to coaching. Why? Because unlike therapists, who hone in on past mistakes and traumas that have led you to develop feelings of inadequacy, coaching focuses on the future—specifically, your future.

A great executive coach helps you look for new wins while also challenging your limiting beliefs. Their job is to help retrain your brain so that you can dispense with old beliefs that no longer serve you and adopt new beliefs that help you live the life you want to live: one full of peace, ease, exhilaration, fulfillment and joy.

Many coaches are people who once dealt with imposter syndrome. Many of them hired a coach for themselves and unlocked their own inner potential—which means they’re especially qualified to help others struggling with imposter syndrome.

If you’re tired of dealing with imposter syndrome and want to start learning about how to challenge your beliefs, highlight your past wins, look to the future with optimism and move forward, it’s worth reaching out to a qualified coach.